My mom reads my online journal what do I do??

I have a Xanga, an online journal, and my mom has bookmarked it! She doesn't know that I know she reads it. I had a different one, then found out she was reading that one, so I switched. Somehow she figured that one out too!





I don't know what to do because that's not for her, it's private, and this really affects how much I trust her. I'm afraid that she looks through my room.





I don't know what to do. I don't know if she would listen to me if I asked her not to read it.





It really bothers me. Why would she read it?? What does she get out of it?? it's none of her business! It's only meant for friends. What should I do?

My mom reads my online journal what do I do??
Dear Debi, I am a 45 yr old mother of three. Two are teenagers, ages 16 and 17, and my oldest is 23. When the oldest was 14, I was putting clothes away in her dresser and found an empty bottle of beer and a used pot pipe. From then on I checked her room regularly. My two younger children have given me no reason to believe they are doing drugs or alcohol and so I have not checked their rooms.





I am making no judgement here as I do not know if you use alcohol or drugs and I don't know your mother. I am saying that parents worry. Yes, your mother invaded your privacy. She probably did this because she cares about you - and I know that sounds completely lame. But how about this:





Share with your mother what you wrote here today and share with here the answers you've received. Most parents are simply petrified that their kids are doing and going through things that they might be able to help with. Share what you are comfortable sharing with your Mom. Let her help with some problems. She might get off your back and trust you. And you might find out that she has been through many of the things you are going through now.
Reply:Its for this reason I've never kept a diary or a journal. Just stop writing in it. You can't tell your mom what to do. Its her house, her comp, and she prob paid for the internet in the first place. Just realize you'll be moving out one day and you can keep all the journals you want. Always brightened my day! lol
Reply:Well, first of all let me tell you I understand because I'd be thoroughly pissed if one of my parents did that. Even through being angry, though, I'd know that they're just doing what parents do: what they think is in your best interest. She's probably just trying to make sure that you're happy and not getting into trouble.





You could make a new account, change your e-mail password, start erasing the web history, and make it impossible for her to bring you up on a search by giving false info, but she'll still be poking around.





I regret to say that there's really no other way to stop her than to talk it out. Don't just tell her to stop interfering with your life because that's the kind of thing that makes her feel she has a right to poke around. You have to explain why you want her to stop and you may have to promise to be less secretive about your day to day. Sometimes parents want to hear the little things so they don't feel left out of your life.
Reply:tell her to stop
Reply:She is your mom she is just worried about you...you will understand when you grow up...but until then you may want to sit down and talk to her...just tell her how you feel about her invading you privacy..and that you would like her to trust you..but keep in mind you have to earn trust..but i learned growing up..to be honest and up front because they will find out what ever you try to hide
Reply:If she's still able to find it, that must mean she's keeping track of your activities on the internet. First of all, switch again and then change the settings of your computers so that visited webpages are not stored. If not, then try talking to her. Ask her why she feels the need to read your private thoughts and ask her stop.
Reply:make your xanga private so only users signed on can read your page.





don't save any passwords, and erase your internet history after you're done with the computer.





lock your room.





or ask her to stop. and if she doesn't listen, hate her for life.
Reply:how about you put in several entries in there about how much you love your mum and if you knew you could trust her you would be able to talk to her more?





and then after a few days put another entry saying something like 'hello mum'





and the day after 'love ya mum'





your mum may then realize that you are bright enough to work out that she is accessing your diary and may stop at that point.
Reply:You say that your Mom's snooping is affecting how much you trust her. Why wouldn't you trust her? Your Mom is the first person you should trust because out of all of the people in your life, your Mom is the only who truly loves you, cares about you and wants what's best for you. Your Mom was a young girl once and I'm sure she remembers what it was like. She's probably been through everything that you're going through now so she would be the perfect person to confide in. Your Mom just wants to know what's going on in your life and if you don't talk to her about private things then she's going to do whatever is necessary to find out and she has the right to do it. If you want her to stop snooping, then start talking to HER instead of just your friends. Friends are great but they but they don't love you like your Mom does. My husband and I have told our children that the only way to keep us from snooping is to talk to us.
Reply:You don't mention your age, so I'll assume you're under 18 for this answer. Anything on the web is literally open to the world... including your mom. Is it possible she reads your web journal because she really wants to understand what's going on with you? Do you spend time with her talking about your life/feelings? I'm guessing not. If you did so, she might not feel a need to read your on-line diary. My guess is that she knows you know she reads it. Also, whether you like it or agree with it, she is responsible for taking you safely into adulthood and obviously takes it very seriously. Most people would call that love.
Reply:Hi Debi:


You are absolutely right to be very, profoundly mad,mad,mad. When I was young my mom read my journals, love letters, and snooped all through my room.





Today my teen agers read my journals and this is wrong.





I think I can answer to why they do it! Even though it is 100% wrong, well, they do it to get to know us deep inside. For some reason I believe they look to us for excitement and pondering our thoughts help them have some kind of life!!! Maddening hey.





I never forgave my mom. I never told her I was mad. I wish I had said how mad I was.





I am always hiding my journals now in good places. I love to write and I really ponder over many things and well, love writing.





Please, mention 'out and out' to her that you are really mad and won't trust her in the future.


Respect yourself, and put your self respect on the line and protect your own thoughts.





luv


Ava
Reply:You... are maybe someday going to be a mothe yourself?? and trust me.. you will look at your child)s stuff...





Maybe your mom feels you do not talk to her much, or maybe she feels something is going on? I really do not know but I feel she has the RIGHT to read your Xanga...





Too many kids out there are getting in trouble on that site and others.. and there is allot of bullying on those sites too.





Your Mom HAS the right.. and you cannot do anything... remember she can always take the computer priviledge away from you... It is her business she loves you!
Reply:My mother always told me to never write anything down that I didn't want someone to read someday. I suggest you follow the same advice. It's your mother's job to keep up with what you are doing. It's for your own good.
Reply:by posting anything on the INTERNET you are publishing it to the WORLD including your mom. things that you'd probably not like your mom reading are probably things that you shouldn't be e-bragging about anyway.





my suggestion if you still care is to change your passwords to all of your acounts, especially your e-mail because she might be hacking it and finding out about new accounts you are registering. also make sure to clear the history browser and cookies after you use the computer.





if you are still concerned i suggest getting a livejournal. there you can make entries friends only and control who can and can't read them.